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Death Follows "Why can’t I see your face?" The cloaked figure replied, "You don’t want to. Yet." The figure was the same height as Heero, but his presence gave the illusion of being much, much taller. "Where am I?" "Do you remember anything?" Heero glared at the figure, trying to force it into answering his question first. But the figure had the air of one who could outwait anything. After several minutes of a staring contest with the faceless cloak, he finally gave in. "I remember an explosion – there was a… mission… we’d infiltrated the OZ base. Duo set the bombs to go off, but the calculations were off. The blueprint I had was out of date – there was supposed to be a corridor there, but it was sealed off – I had to go around it. I didn’t have enough time to get out of there before they exploded." "Was it just you, then, Heero? Was no one else with you?" "No… Duo…" Heero was distracted by the bit of hair that was revealed from beneath the cowl of the cloak. It was a long chestnut-colored braid. But he continued. "It was all of us… we were all there. The other three tried to beat the timers to the rendezvous point -- I don’t know if they made it. But neither Duo nor I could get out before the bombs went off. Duo… tried to get to the bombs to reset the timers, but I guess… he didn’t make it." Gradually, it became clear to Heero where they were. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t noticed before. They were in the room he and Duo shared at the boarding school they had been hiding in. Two twin beds on either side of the small room. Barely enough space between them to put a nightstand. Painfully bright white light shone through the windows and spilled over the beds, dressers and floor. The light seemed to blot out the walls – it was almost as if the room was floating in space somewhere, except it was in white space rather than outer space. But the room looked somewhat different than usual. For one thing, the room was spic-and-span clean. The whole room. Not just Heero’s side of it. It looked almost unlived in, except for the few things Duo kept on the surface of his dresser. A mini Deathscythe model. A mini Wing model. Five assorted-color ponytail holders. Six packs of Big Red. A CD single ("Saishuushou" from the Zetsuai OST). [1] Three watches (two digital, one analog). One black shoe lace. One toothpick, used. But aside from that, the room looked odd to Heero because he was on Duo’s side of the room, gazing at his own bed across the room. Not that he hadn’t been on Duo’s side of the room before – there wasn’t really any way to avoid being on Duo’s "side" of the room because of the size of the room – but he’d never gone and sat down on his bed. Heero looked around and spotted something stuck to Duo’s side of the nightstand – where no one would be able to see it unless they were sitting on Duo’s bed – that reflected the bright light. He couldn’t make out what it was and turned toward the cloaked figure that stood in the middle of the room, with the tail of its chestnut braid falling over its shoulder. "What’s that?" "That? Let me help you." Suddenly the white light disappeared. The walls were visible once again and the stars were shining in the night sky outside the window. It was a clear night and moonlight lit up the room. The thing that had just moments before reflected in the white light was now encased in shadow. Heero leaned across the bed and flicked on the lamp that sat on the nightstand. The warm, slightly yellow glow of the bulb revealed a photograph. He remembered the scene. Heero had just come back from a week-long solo mission, during which he’d had to leave his beloved laptop at the safehouse with the other pilots. There had been no way for him to explain owning a laptop and no where for him to hide one. At that time the pilots’ "safehouse" hadn’t been more than a ramshackle one-room affair, which meant they’d all been sleeping in sleeping bags. There had been a small coffee table in the center of the room where they had placed Heero’s laptop. As soon as he had come back he headed straight for the table and reached a hand out to almost *caress* the computer. At the time, Duo had just woken up and seeing Heero, reached a hand to lay on his shoulder to ask if he was okay, if the mission had gone well. But Quatre had been taking pictures for a memory scrapbook or some such thing and seeing Heero come back, took a picture of him as he reached for the laptop. Heero looked up the moment he heard the camera focus, but he was not quick enough to avoid having his picture taken. So he’d been caught with an expression that was a cross between surprise and a fierce possessiveness over his laptop. And Duo had also been caught. His hand reaching toward Heero’s shoulder, still drowsy with sleep, a look of…. *something* on Duo’s face. Heero couldn’t tell what that look meant. Heero looked up in confusion toward the cloaked figure with its braid peeking out and asked, "Why does Duo have this?" "Don’t you know why, Heero?" The cloaked figure asked. "No." The figure’s shoulders dipped a little. "Do you know what the look on his face means?" Heero thought back, searching his memory for a time when Duo had ever had that look on his face. But he couldn’t recall one instance. "No. I’ve never seen it on his face before." "Duo is good at stealth." "Yes, Deathscythe is equipped with the best ECM [2] available." "No, Heero. Duo is good at *hiding*. It’s what he’s been doing all his life. Can you think of another person you saw with this look on their face?" Heero thought back once again. He remembered seeing Quatre with that look on his face when talking about Trowa, before they had become lovers. "Yes. But… I don’t understand. Duo doesn’t… he wouldn’t… Who ARE you? And where IS this place? This isn’t our dorm room." Heero seemed to snap out of the convalescence that had taken over. "Don’t you know yet, Heero?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The cowl slipped back a little, and Heero could see chestnut-colored bangs which hung in front of the still-hidden face. "Duo…" he whispered. Then his voice hardened. "What do you think you’re doing. What kind of game are you playing?" Violet eyes revealed amusement as the cowl slipped completely off the figure’s head. "I’m not Duo." Heero could see that. The cloaked figure was Duo’s height, had Duo’s chestnut hair, his braid, even his violet eyes. But it wasn’t Duo’s face that was revealed as the cowl fell off. In fact, the figure had no face to speak of, nor a mouth with which it spoke. "Do you remember anything else about the mission, Heero?" "Na.. nani?! I…" Duo… No, it wasn’t Duo. What the hell was this thing? "Do you remember anything else about the mission? About the mission... About the mission... About the mission... The MISSION..." The figure’s voice echoed loudly in Heero’s ears. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The mission? There was *something*. Something he was forgetting. The five of them had separate missions to do simultaneously. He didn’t know what the others’ missions were, but his was to retrieve a certain disk with data on new OZ weaponry. Duo’s mission, in addition to aiding in the infiltration of the grounds, was to create the required decoy in order for them to make a safe getaway. Heero had reached the room where the disk was located and after a calm and logical search (in contrast to the time limit that had just been cut even shorter), he located the disk and set off at a run toward the rendezvous point. On the ground floor he was passing through yet another corridor when he heard a loud "Shit! Shit! Shit! No time! No time!" Duo was struggling with the door of what looked like an underground bunker of some kind. The door was made of a gundaniam-lead alloy and was a bitch to get open for one person alone. Duo turned, gun at ready, as he heard footsteps running down the hall and come to a halt behind him. Heero started forward to help Duo with the bunker door when a sound cut through the eerie silence. Duo’s watch beeped. Almost in slow motion, Duo ran forward toward Heero and opened his mouth to yell a warning, but it was too late. The bombs went off. There was flying shrapnel everywhere and the walls were crumbling around them. There was an odd sensation in Heero’s chest and he looked down to see that Duo had been thrown against his chest from the blast, although Duo had made a running leap toward him just before the bombs had gone off. Duo, the demolitions expert, had known what to expect. He’d set the bombs, after all. They were *his* tools and he knew exactly what kind of damage they could do. Heero felt a wet stickiness running down his arms toward his fingers. It was blood. But he didn’t know whose body it belonged to, his or Duo’s. Duo was pinned against his chest, both of them impaled on a stray piece of shrapnel. It had gone through the center of Duo’s back and out the center of his chest, and then through to the middle of Heero’s body. Blood poured from Duo’s mouth and he choked out "Gomen... Shinigami... lives." As Duo died and Heero lost consciousness, his last thoughts were, //Iie... Shinigami is dead.// ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heero stood up. "Duo... Duo is dead." The figure nodded its still-incomplete head. "He tried to save me." One ear formed on the left side of the figure’s head. "He gave his life..." The right ear formed. "... for mine." Its nose popped into existence in the middle of the figure’s face. "Shinigami..." Heero said with sudden insight. At last, a mouth began to take shape. "Are YOU what he meant when he said..." Two lips formed, a smile stretching the figure’s face. "...Shinigami... lives?!" Teeth were bared, revealed, in a parody of a smile. "Yes, you begin to understand," the figure that was Duo and yet was definitely NOT Duo said. "You’re not Duo." "No, Heero, I’m not Duo." "What are you?" "You know now, Heero. You’ve given me a face, so you know who I am. What I am." "You’re Shinigami. Death." And Death nodded its head. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oddly enough, Heero didn’t question the fact that Death looked like Duo. It seemed fitting. What he questioned was what he was doing there. "Why am I here, then. Am I dead?" "You could be." "Well, am I or not?" "It’s up to you, Heero." Heero’s eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, it’s up to me? That doesn’t make any sense. I am either dead or alive. There is no choice." "There is for you." Heero caught the stress Shinigami placed on the "you." "Why do I get a choice?" "Because I... because Duo risked his life for yours. He would have preferred for his body to stop the shrapnel completely, rather than just slowing it down. For all intents and purposes, Heero, he gave his life so that yours could continue. It was unfortunate that you died anyway. Now it is up to you to take responsibility for that gift and make the decision as to what to do with it." "What do you mean, ‘make the decision as to what to do with it’? How can I do anything with his life if he’s dead." Shinigami frowned. "It is unlike you to play dumb, Heero. You must make the choice whether to live or to die. Now, removed from your body, you must make the choice. Shinigami does not give this choice to everyone. Duo has not given this choice to anyone before. Not even Solo. He has not risked his life so personally for anyone else but YOU, Heero." Heero wished he would stop saying his name over and over. It sounded too much like the way Duo said his name. It sounded exactly like the way Duo said it. The first syllable seemed to fairly hurl out of his mouth like he couldn’t contain it, the second following more slowly almost sorrowfully. "HEEro... HEEro... HEEro..." He couldn’t get Duo’s voice out of his head. "You could stay here, Heero. With me. Just think what it could be like." Heero felt a weight settle over his shoulder blades. He flexed them and heard the flapping of wings – the clap as they buffeted the air. Then the weight disappeared from his back. They were gone. Death – for he’d started to believe that this was Death after all – stroked a hand down where, for one brief, heart-stopping moment, he’d had wings, real wings. Death let his fingertips trail over the spot where he’d last felt the weight of the wings. The sensation tingled through his shoulder blades, down his spine and low in his stomach where he felt a throbbing warmth spread. "Or would you rather go back. Back to life." Heero first doubled over in pain, which spread throughout his body – replacing the sweet warmth of a moment before. This was the pain of life. Of living. His eyes were blinded from the images that passed before them – memories. Of himself. Of Duo. It was like staring at the flashing strobe lights at a nightclub. But he couldn’t look away – not when the images continued even when he closed his eyes to shut them out. Death’s hands smoothed down Heero’s arms slowly. As they did so, the pain stopped in the trail of pleasure left by the hands. The hands that touched Heero all over, caressing his skin and arousing his body. Heero’s eyes slid shut as *his* hands left a trail of fire down his chest and sucked in a breath as a hand grasped his arousal through his jeans. His hips jerked up to press into the hand, seemingly of their own volition. Shinigami’s cloak was suddenly gone. Whether he’d taken it off manually or if it had just disappeared, Heero didn’t know. Nor did he care that his own shirt had met a similar fate. Shinigami continued to keep his hand pressed against Heero’s straining erection. Just holding the hand there, teasing him. Not moving, but not letting up on the pressure either. They were both still standing there in the middle of the room, but Heero could feel his legs buckling and he abruptly sat down on the edge of Duo’s bed. Shinigami leaned over to run a tongue over Heero’s nipple. He bit down lightly, causing Heero to shiver. He laved the nipple again as he began to unbutton Heero’s jeans, sliding them off with Heero’s help, taking Heero’s briefs along with it. Heero shuddered as cool air met his throbbing length. "Shhhh," Shinigami whispered as he trailed a hand down the center of Heero’s chest, the same way he had done before, this time allowing it to grasp the base of Heero’s erection and slowly stroke once down to the tip, feeling the wetness there. Shinigami followed the trail of his hand with his open mouth. And when he came to his arousal, Heero whispered, "oh god." Shinigami let his tongue stroke the underside of Heero’s cock before taking it into his mouth, allowing the tip to touch the back of his throat and humming, much to Heero’s immense pleasure. He pulled back, suckling on the tip, listening to Heero’s moans as he allowed his tongue to tease the slit at its head. He repeated his teasing, always bringing Heero to the precipice, but never allowing him to go over it. Standing up, he pushed Heero flat down on the bed before pushing Heero’s feet up on the bed with bent knees and then kneeling on the floor once again. He stroked the underside of Heero’s cock again with his tongue before lapping at the tight ring of muscle around Heero’s entrance. Finally he pushed his tongue inside, causing Heero’s hips to jerk and buck against him. But Shinigami held on to Heero’s hips, keeping him in place, stretching him with fingers and tongue, preparing him. Having felt that he’d lubricated Heero enough, Shinigami stood up and leaned over Heero on the bed. He positioned himself at Heero’s entrance and began pushing inside when Heero grabbed the back of his head and drew him down for a soul-searing kiss as he gained entrance to Heero’s tight heat. Heero could taste himself on Shinigami’s lips. He could taste himself inside his mouth, on his tongue. It was driving him crazy. He moaned again as Shinigami pulled out until he was barely inside him anymore, then slowly pushed back in. And pulled out again. And pushed back in. And again. And again. But then Shinigami wasn’t in control anymore. Heero began to contract his muscles, squeezing Shinigami’s cock inside him, rolling his hips to torture Shinigami even more. Shinigami lowered his head to Heero’s and heard him whisper, "you feel so good inside me." It broke what little control Shinigami had left to hear his lover’s whisper and he thrust deeply into Heero even as he grasped Heero’s cock and began to pump. Eyes locked with Heero’s, they came. "Duo!" Heero screamed as he climaxed. Shinigami, with sweat dripping down his forehead onto Heero’s, looked straight into his eyes and whispered, "I see you’ve made your choice." Heero panted, out of breath and overwhelmed from the force and the feeling of giving his soul to Shinigami. But surrendering his soul wasn’t as difficult as one would imagine. Because he’d given his heart to Duo a long time ago and never realized it. To Shinigami. To Duo. They were one and the same. "It was not difficult." Shinigami closed his eyes. "I will see you eventually." Heero paused. "Duo." Violet eyes filled with laughter opened. "I see you found me out, Hee-chan. Don’t be too hard on me when you return, ne? I still have a ways to go." "Ninmu ryoukai." Duo chuckled. "One last kiss, then." Duo closed his violet eyes and leaned in close, pressing his open lips to Heero’s. His tongue slipped inside, rubbing against Heero’s tongue and teeth as Heero returned the favor. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Duo opened his eyes and broke himself away from the kiss, feeling a pang at the loss. "Hee... Heero?" Duo was pressed against Heero’s chest, laying on top of him on the floor of the building collapsing around them. The flying shrapnel had apparently missed them by a good two feet, Duo’s flying tackle apparently pushing them out of the way just in time. In an instant, Duo knew what had taken place between himself and Heero. Or rather, Shinigami and Heero. When Duo died -- and he *had* died -- he never expected to see Heero again. It had been his dying wish that Heero would be able to survive the impaling. He had never expected Shinigami to take over that way and give Heero the choice! Heero pulled himself to his feet and grabbed Duo’s hand. "No time, koi. The building is falling apart around us." They both started running for the rendezvous point they had all agreed upon before the mission began. Outside Duo blinked as it hit him. Had Heero just called him *KOI*?! later, in Duo’s bed in the dorm room] They were laying on their sides, facing each other, Duo’s head lying against Heero’s outstretched arm. It took talent to squeeze in together on the twin bed. "Shinigami sleeps now." "Yes." "He’s waiting for you to join him, Heero." "I know, Duo." Duo looked away and shivered slightly. He couldn’t believe that he felt *jealous* of Shinigami. It was himself, dammit! But he knew that sooner or later, Shinigami would claim Heero and Duo would never see him again. Even after Duo himself died. A hand reached out and grabbed his chin, forcing him to look back at Heero. "You will be with me then, Duo." Duo lowered his eyes, disbelieving. But Heero drew him back. "YOU are Shinigami. You and he are one and the same. And you told me you would follow me anywhere. Beyond the bonds of life, and into the bonds of death." Owari. I glomp feedback! C&C onegaishimasu! ========================================================= Notes: |